Today is gonna be a great day!!

I can already tell that today is gonna be kewl!! I already this morning got a very sweet and encouraging message from Becca on Facebook.... She says we need to start a "team Kristie" group on FB!! AWWWWWWWW!!!!! I love that I have groupies!!! LOL!!! So thanks so much Becca and oh and BTW I used to have a crush on Micheal when I was young!! TEEEEHEEEEEEEEE!!!

I can honestly say that I am really PROUD of myself and I haven't really had that feeling about myself in a long time.. I am mostly proud of the fact that my head is clearer these days.. I feel focused and driven to do the right thing for my life, my body, and my family.. I am proud of the fact that although sometimes it's difficult I am still going strong. I am proud that I can look in the mirror at myself and NOT feel disgusted:)

Today was Bradyn's first day at school on adderhall.. I wish so much he didn't have this problem but really I am thinking it may be helping some already.. This weekend was semi relaxed.. He wasn't zoned out or anything like I was afraid he would be on the meds so that is really good.. He just seemed to be less aggitated some.. Bless my baby's wittle bitty bones.. I love my little monkey head so much..

I am going to the gym tonight.. Actually probably earlier than usual though.. I think we are going to start painting my kitchen tonight.. I have having a little get together Friday and my kitchen looks HORRIBLE from the remodeling..


Here is a pic of my HORRIBLE kitchen right now.. I told mama that I atleast want to get the green paint on the wall and maybe my kick ass curtains up before the party.. We are going to do a metal sheeting thing on the bottom of the chair rail.. But we probably won't get that done in time.. Oh well.. Well in this pic you can't even see the chair rail but it's there I promise!! So far we have ripped down all the really OLD wall paper.. about 5 layers!!! And we also knocked out that horrible desk that Bradyn is touching in the pic..

The Precore machine is my bitch!!!!

LOL.. I totally rocked the Precore Friday night.. I can usually only do like maybe 5 min but I don't know what it was but Friday night I kept going and going and going... I hit over 15min!! HOT DAMN!!! I was just soooo freakin' excited about that.. That dang machine has been the devil to me since I started working out there.. It hurt so bad to exercise on it.. Susan also stayed on it for 15 min.. It hurts her too.. The funny thing was for her is that she was riding the heck out of it BACKWARDS and had no idea.. She looked so funny hanging on for dear life just a peddling!! LOL.. Our trainer came over and told her she was riding backwards and maybe going forwards would be easier.. I lauged so hard I almost fell off!! LOL

It's Thursday!!!!

I am really feeling good these days.. Well except for having my monthly visitor (TMI?????) LOL!!!! I can really tell I am loosing.. I wish it would come off a heck of a lot faster though!!!!!!!! I put on my size 22 jeans the other day and I COULD BUTTON THEM!! HOT DIGGITY DAWG.. Now let me say this.. They were not really loose or anything but still I could button them!! LOL.. I wanted to say thank you to all my readers who are following along and who give me lots of support during this.. It is hard and sometimes I want to quit but the urge to stop isn't overwhelming anymore.. I feel really good about that.. I really do enjoy working out.. I have lots of energy afterwards. So in the words of the wise Martha Stewart "that's a good thing".

A big thank you goes out to my cousin Dawn E. Lou!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!

I also wanted to say Hi to Millie and Leigh!! So HI MILLIE AND LEIGH!! We should go to lunch someday!!!!

Hey this kinda sounds like I am accepting some sort of an award doesn't it.. Hell maybe I am!!!

Life...

Life is so very very precious and I think we all take it for granted sometimes..Well I can't say "we" all I can only speak for myself.. I TAKE IT FOR GRANTED SOMETIMES! I kinda had a wake up call so to speak today.. I have a friend and her name is Stacy Barber.. Stacy has battled cancer for a long time.. It finally won.. She lost her battle last night.. Cancer is so damn cruel.. It invades our bodies and takes steals the very life God gave us.. Hearing this news today made me really sit and think.. I thought about my life and how much I spend of it doing nothing to better it.. Don't get me wrong I am working my ass off at the gym but in other ways I mean.. I am sitting here with the world at my fingertips and I keep washing my hands of it.. Stacy's life was cut short.. She was only 31 years young. It scares me.

What a crazy few days!!!

I worked out tonight but I hadn't been to the gym since last Thursday!! I worked out with D and that man made me soo sore.. I felt like I was sick for a few days after.. Literally SICK!!! I had a bit of a fever too!! Also Bradyn has been a bit of a handful as well!! He has been going through a HORRIBLE phase!!! But all is better right now. I feel much better now that I went and worked out tonight!! It was tough since I hadn't been in a few days but still it felt good!!

Holy Sore Body Batman!!!!

WOW!! I am soooo freakin' sore today... I didn't know if I would make it working out tonight but I really needed to go to maybe walk some of this soreness out.. I worked out with D Yesterday and he really made Q and I work our tails off!! I am still doing really well with my workouts and I have added a few more veggies and fruits to my day.. But how I wish I could wiggle my nose like a Genie and POOF... I would be all fit and healthy!! This is sooo hard especially since I can hardly move right now!!!

Been Thinking...

Can one overcome an eating disorder on there on??? I don't know the answer to that.. I just don't know.. I have tried therapies and well I just don't like them.. but who really loves to go to therapy and have deal with all their personal crap?? I have done so well with my exercising ...but the eating part???...well that is another story in itself.. I am not binging on things like I did so that is GREAT. I still do feel the urge to purge sometimes though.. I am trying soooo damn hard during my workouts and it makes me mad to damn well know I should NOT eat a certain thing and then I do eat it and I just want it out of my body! But then part of me doesn't want to have to monitor ever freakin' thing I eat.. I mean good grief who wants to do that all the time!!!!!????!!! I WANT TO BE ABLE TO EAT WHAT I WANT AND NOT FEEL ASHAMED ABOUT IT.. I know it's moderation but with me I STILL feel bad even if I have a few bites of it!! GRRRRRRRR What is freakin' wrong with me!!!?? Why is food such an obstacle with me??? Some people say "you should eat to live not live to eat" but what the crap does that really mean.. I don't live to eat but I like to eat.. Is that really wrong?