WOW... long time no post!!!!

Happy New Year!! I kinda fell behind on this.. and I really don't know why.. It made me feel better to have a diary of sorts.. What have I been up to these days?? I have really been doing a TON of photography.. I love it so much.. I have also been really really into Zumba!! It is so much fun. I have lost some weight from doing it as well which is a PLUS in my book! I haven't lost as much as I would have maybe 30 or 40 or so.. I will say it gets frustrating though. I feel like I work so hard at loosing weight and just doesn't come off like I think it should.. I dunno maybe this new year will bring new things for me..

Where in the hell am I????

I have been asking myself that here lately too!! I just don't know.. I haven't felt good at all for a few months.. I just feel blah.. That's just the best way to explain how I am feeling.. Along with Blah I am crazy emotional, tired, sluggish, I have tons of anxiety and my heart still flutters a lot..I did go to the Endocrinologist last week though and he is going to increase my synthroid so maybe that will help.. One thing this guy said though was that he thought I was OCD!! WTF!!??? I mean I guess I can see it a little in some of the things I am anal about but not to the point of having medicine.. He prescribed med some kinda pill for it too.. He also kept saying.. "YOU GOOD GIRL, YOU GOOD GIRL".. LOL.. he was from another country so I wasn't quite sure what that meant!! I guess it means I am a good girl but um yea!!.. OK......The tests also showed my bad cholesteral was a little high.. He said to eat more fruits and veggies and less of the other crap.. I don't eat a lot of fried crap anyway so I guess I can work on that.. I also haven't been going to the gym in a bout 2 weeks or more!! Like I said.. I just haven't feel good.. I literally didn't want to get out of the bed for several weeks.. I haven't really gained any weight back so that is good.. but I haven't lost any more either.. So I really don't know where I am in my life right now.. I am just on a stand still waiting for something.. A good swift kick in the ass maybe??? I don't know..

Opps I did it again!!

I said I was going to keep updating regularly again didn't I??? Sorry!! I have really been doing good lately.. I have been losing more weight and I can really tell it now.. I was starting to worry and thinking to myself.. OMG will this weight ever fucking come off!!! I was really really getting frusterated!! I think the synthroid is helping! I have lost about 4 sizes so far!! I am sooo excited and so proud of myself.. Today I made Bradyn, Kelsey and Missha jog with me!! LOL.. I still want to do the Couch to 5k thing but it is still so hard for me to jog for a whole minute at a time I think a lot of it is that my weight holds me back from being able to jog for long periods of time anyway today I made them jog for 30second intervals for about a mile and a half or so.. It was hard but we did it!! I still go to the gym regularly and my eating I think has really improved.. I try to go for the more healthy stuff now.. I still have urges to throw up my food but I really really try to get my mind off of it when I am feeling it bad.. Bradyn has been so cute about my weight loss too.. He giggles when I show him that I can take my jeans off with out unbuttoning them!! LOL.. He keeps saying he can't wait to "put his arms around me all the way when I loose more weight".. I just want to make sure he knows that being skinny isn't always healthy and that it's best to be healthy and not worry about how small you are.. I struggled with that my whole life.. I don't want him to have the same feelings about his body like I did and do..

I am back.. FAITHFULLY!!! I promise!!

I have missed some gym time because I have been a sick girlie.. For the past 2 weeks or more I have felt just plain lousy.. I was very very moody, emotional, EXHAUSTED, my shoulders were numb a lot at night time, my heart was palpitating all the time, but what really worried me was one day I was in the shower and I was combing out my hair after shampooing it and chunks came out.. I could feel it coming out at the root!! It really scared me.. My hair is kinda my thing and to even think that I was loosing it.. TERRIFIED me!! So the very next day I went to the Dr and they ran some blood work and found that my thyroid was out of whack!! I have Hypothyroidism.. I kinda thought all along I would end up with a thyroid problem though.. I was told when I was 19 that I had a thyroid problem but when I moved back home from college I was told it was fine.. So all these years every time I have been sick they have tested for thyroid and NOTHING.. Well until last week!! My Dr put me on synthroid.. She also said that with hypothyroidism (hypo for short) can be the reason why it has been sooooo very difficult for me to loose weight.. She said taking the meds may help.. So that is a positive thing.. I THINK.. I didn't realize but the thyroid has a lot to do with the body.. It affects your hormones and everything! NO WONDER I WAS A CRAZED BANCHEE!!! lol..

So what do I do from here?? Well I did start back at the gym this week and I am going to try my best to do the program COUCH TO 5K I will probably have to take my time on this since I still have so much more weight to loose but I AM going to do it. I have always wanted to run.. I have even daydreamed before about crossing a finish line and I get all teary.. I haven't gained ANY of the weight I had lost so that is a great thing!! I just have to start not really over because that would mean freakin' 2 min on the DEVIL machine and I can do so much more than that now, I just have to start where I left off!!! :) TA TA for now!!

Wow... Where have I been????!!??

I can't believe it's been this long since I have blogged!! I kinda left everyone in the dark didn't I??!!!?? Well what has been going on with me you ask? Just life I guess.. I have still been going to the gym only not so much this last week.. I have been in a big time funk lately.. Something I really need to pray about.. My family and I have been having some tough times lately.. Kinda like when it rains it pours.. I have felt so damn overwhelmed lately.. It's been one thing after another.. The day before yesterday when I thought I had enough I go and run my car across the side of the little metal rails that block the gas tanks so I dent and scratch up the passenger side of the door big time!! UGH!!! I cried and Allen just hugged me and told me it was ok and that it happens.. He is really the best husband anyone could have.. Sometimes I forget that.. I am really a fortunate person to have him in my life.. He is just amazing.. I don't think I have lost any more weight.. I feel all crappy lately because I haven't gone this week too.. :(.. It's just been a tough week for me.. I did feel the need to purge my food a few times this week.. I think I am realizing that when I am really stressed I do it the most.. It does help to be honest on here though.. I feel like it holds me accountable.. Well I need to go I have such a BUSY day ahead of me.. I have to get ready for my garage sale, edit some photos for Deanna, and other stuff..

I had my 3 month assesment today!

I was very proud of my results however I do I wish I had lost more weight but I have to keep telling myself that is JUST numbers!! Here are my results!
My previous body fat was at 45.0 and my new body fat % is 39.3!! My trainer said he was VERY proud of that because it takes so much just to loose 1%!! My bicep strength went from 56 to 64, My resting heart rate went from a "fair" score of 82 to and "EXCELLENT" score of 70, my blood pressure stayed the same it was good on my first assessment and it's still great:), My aerobic fitness went from 19.8 to a 24.7, and my overall fitness score went from a 43 to a 37!!!! I think that is pretty damn good, right??!!!???!!??!!

I feel like I have lost about 50lbs today!!!! LOL

Wow did I have an active day!!!!!!!!!! Let me say first off I am sorry for not updating sooner.. I have been kinda busy with the family lately but I have kept going to the gym and walking with mom a few days a week!! I didn't go to the gym yesterday because I didn't feel so good (woman troubles... YUCK!!!!!) I did go today and I ROCKED the precore.. I was so freakin' proud of myself!!! I have been doing better and better on it.. This week I went with Amanda L. and one day we did 20min on the precore and the next we did 21!! But today was my bestest time eva!!! I even got proof!! LOL Freakin 31.15min!! Can you beleive it!!!???!!!I went from barely making 2 minutes to 31.5!!! I am stoked!! I probably could have kept going too!!! I really wasn't that tired.. I do think that having my ipone helps though because I can watch a movie while I am workin' out!! LOL..
After the gym Bradyn and I went for a little bike ride. We rode for about a mile or so but my legs were kinda sore and he just now learned to ride his bike so he still isn't that sure of himself on it yet:) so we layed on a blanket in the front yard and we read some books which was nice and relaxing.. Then mama came home from work and we ate and then went for a walk.. We walked about 2 miles!!!! I FEEL GOOD BUT MY BODY IS SORE.. I really am proud of myself though!!!!! GO ME!!!

Our day!

Sadly we didn't get to go to the zoo BUT we did have a great day!!!! I felt so good today.. All day long..Since we didn't get to go to the zoo as planned Bradyn and I went to the park and had another picnic and he brought his scooter so he could play. We ate, played, walked, fed ducks and went to the little museum at the park.. Afterwards we went home and played outside some more.. I decided to ride my bike around our circle drive and Bradyn rode his scooter.. He kept saying how he wished he could ride his bike without the training wheels.. This has been a big time battle for him for about 2 years now.. He was just sooooooo very afraid of falling.. We tried encouraging him but it just didn't work so we thought he would do it when he is ready.. Well today must have been that day!!!!!! He tried and tried for about 2 hours and FINALLY got the hang of it.. I was such a proud mama bear!!!! We ended up playing bike race around the circle.. LOL.. It was fun.. I really enjoy being able to keep up with him more!!

my body hurts!

Today I felt pretty damn good except for when I started walking tonight.. I stretched and everything but the sides of my legs hurt so bad during my walk.. I am not sure what is up with that.. I didn't go to the gym today because I was just really tired today.. I felt good I was just tired.. Mama and I did do our 2 mile walk tonight though so that's good!!! I haven't felt the urge to purge a whole lot lately.. I am not saying I don't feel I want to sometimes though but lately I haven't. We are goin to the zoo tomorrow.. Bradyn is crazy exited about that and I must admit.. I am too!!

Ugh!! I am so tired!

I didn't sleep well last night and I had to get up early today and go to the Dermatologist to have some spots looked at.. Luckily it was nothing.. I don't have cancer.. I was really worried about that since both my mommy and my Nonie have had skin cancer. After the Dr.s visit I went to Mooreville and got my hair trimmed....IT NEEDED IT BAD... I really want to go to the gym but seriously my body and mind are just tired right now.. Mama is coming home around 5 so I think I am just going to walk with her today.. I have done really good this week though.. I went to the gym 2 times and walked 3!!! Tomorrow I think we are going to the zoo in Memphis so I see a whole lot more walking in my future!!

What a workout day!!!!!!!!!

That was some of the pics I took today!!!
Wow.. Let me tell ya about today.. So I get up around 9ish.. Watch TV for a little while cause it takes me a min to get fully awake!! LOL.. Go check my emails and such and then I went to the GYM around 10:45. I did my 15 min on the Precore, 5 min on the rower (that thing also kicks my tail.. It doesn't hurt it just gets the heart rate up!!) and then 10 min on the bike.. Then I did my weights followed by the sauna!! I went and layed about 12 min in the sun bed( I know I know it's not the most healthiest thing in the world.. I don't particularly like to lay much.. I usually lay about 2 times a week just to have a teeny bit of color. It makes me feel better!) and then went home, took a shower, went to Mooreville and did some visiting and took some photos of various places around my family's land, then went back towards Tupelo where I took more pictures...AND FINALLY WENT HOME AROUND 6:30pm.. Allen and Bradyn were not home yet so I played with the photos I took on photoshop and them mama called at 8:30 and wanted me to go for a walk with her.. SO I WENT FOR ANOTHER 2 MILE WALK!!!!!! I think it is safe to say that my body is TIRED now!!!! LOL..I am so proud of myself for it though!!! Yay me!!!

Me again Margret!!

Who is Margret?? Hell if I know!!!! LOL! I didn't go to the gym today but I ended up walking with my mom this afternoon!! We walked and then rode around and clocked our distance.. We walked right at 2 miles!!! I am definitely going to go to the gym tomorrow though.. I miss it! I want to hit that steam room too!!!

slacker slacker slacker slacker slacker slacker slacker slacker!!!

What the crap is wrong with me???!!!???!! I don't know why I am not motivated much lately.. Part of the reason though is because I feel like I can't really see the results I want to see quick enough.. I know that if I loose it fast I will probably gain it back but because I have been overweight my ENTIRE life I just want to see it gone!!!

Hola!!!

Well today has been a pretty good day so far.. I haven't been too busy or anything today.. I didn't go to the gym because I really wanted to walk outside for some reason! It was really cold out but I still wanted to smell the fresh air! Bradyn and I walked for about 40 min or so.. He kept saying he wanted to go home because his feet and legs hurt but I made him walk..It is really good for him to get outside and I really want to encourage him to go out more! Plus we did have fun.. We play games when we walk.. We played "tour bus" today.. I pretended like I was giving him a tour of the "historic" neighborhood and we saw a witches house that we couldn't look at because if we did we would be captured by her!! LOL.. So of course he looks at it so I told him he had to say "I won't look" backwards 10 times to undo the spell!! I know the only person who is really going to appreciate this story is my much loved Dawny Lou!!!!! We also saw a dog who wasn't a real dog. He was a HUMOG.. Half human half dog!!! I told him he couldn't pet it because he would turn into a HUMOG too!! LOL.. He loves to pretend with me!! Ok so I like to play with my kid!! I still have a great imagination wouldn't ya say!!!!??? LOL.. Yesterday we had a fun day too.. It was a very pretty and warm day so we did his homework outside, read his books outside, and played a little laser tag!!! I love the fact that I can keep up with him now... It's a lot of fun!!

Back in that game!!!

I knew I would be!! Did ya ever doubt me???!!!?? I went yesterday and today.. I actually went earlier today than normal.. I think I am going to start going early from now on even though I like going with Susan (aka Debbie aka Q) at night.. There is just toooooooo many dang people there at night time and I can never get a machine!! It's kinda aggravating plus Bradyn doesn't really like to go and stay up there for an hour and a half waiting on me.. It just makes sense to go while he is at school.. I did the precore both days!! So that's great.. I know I talk about that damn machine a lot but it was kinda like this big obstacle thing for me.... Now I can say that I do like to get on it.. It hurts like hell and makes me sweat all over the place but I guess that's when you know it's working, right????

Ok I admit it!!!

I have totally been avoiding this blog!!!!!! I haven't done good lately.. Not that I have purged or anything but I haven't exercised at all for about 5 days!! OMG!!! I can really tell too.. I don't really have an excuse other than I had a jewelry party at my house Friday night and when I have something like that I get a really big overwhelming feeling that just takes over my whole body.. I get headaches, nervousness feeling etc.. I guess it's anxiety??? I don't know why I do it.. I am such a crazy perfectionist.. You should have seen how freakin' clean my house was that night!! LOL..I am feeling much more like myself now and I know that I have to get back on my routine now.. I am not going to beat myself up about missing those days though.. What good will that do, really??? It will just make me feel bad and right now I don't feel like feeling bad.. It is a gorgeous warm day outside.. God wants me to feel good and so I do!!:)

OH MY!! I about had a melt down with my kid..

Bradyn is really really testing me today.. I just don't know what to do with him.. He is being so disrespectful and very mean. So I decided to come to the computer and vent a little so I can cool down a bit! I didn't go work out today.. I just didn't have time. I didn't get home until about 3 or so and since then I have been cleaning my house and fighting with Bradyn... I have got to get this pig sty cleaned up before my party!!!! I am one of these people that has to have a perfect house before company comes.. LOL.. And one thing that is really bothering me is that my kitchen isn't completed yet.. It's pretty much painted but that's it.. I really wish I could get my living room done before Friday too but there is no way in hell that will happen so I will just have to make do with what I got!! Ok I am finished venting now..

Is it Friday yet???

I had a pretty good day.. I went and worked out and didn't quite make it to 15 min on the precore today.. I just wasn't on my game.. I didn't eat good today.. I actually didn't eat much of anything I just didn't feel that great so when I went to work out I kinda got a little whoosy feeling so I left.. I still got in my 30 min but I was bummed because I didn't do the precore longer.. LOL.. Ain't that a bitch??????!!! Now I am actually wanting to do the Precore and I got all weird feeling while I was on it.. LOL..

I had an awesome work out today!!!

Wow I totally rocked the gym today.. I did 15min on the precore, 10 on the bike and 5 on the rower plus I walked a mile to warm up!!! I felt so pumped afterward!!! My body is a little sore already but it's that good sore feeling... As far as eating goes I have just been trying to cut back on high fatty bad for ya type foods..I still eat some stuff that isn't the best in the world for me but like I said.. I love food!!! I am having a party on Friday and I am already foaming at the mouth thinking of all that party food!! LOL!!! I did end up having a good day today so thank you so much Becca for starting my day off on a good note;)

Today is gonna be a great day!!

I can already tell that today is gonna be kewl!! I already this morning got a very sweet and encouraging message from Becca on Facebook.... She says we need to start a "team Kristie" group on FB!! AWWWWWWWW!!!!! I love that I have groupies!!! LOL!!! So thanks so much Becca and oh and BTW I used to have a crush on Micheal when I was young!! TEEEEHEEEEEEEEE!!!

I can honestly say that I am really PROUD of myself and I haven't really had that feeling about myself in a long time.. I am mostly proud of the fact that my head is clearer these days.. I feel focused and driven to do the right thing for my life, my body, and my family.. I am proud of the fact that although sometimes it's difficult I am still going strong. I am proud that I can look in the mirror at myself and NOT feel disgusted:)

Today was Bradyn's first day at school on adderhall.. I wish so much he didn't have this problem but really I am thinking it may be helping some already.. This weekend was semi relaxed.. He wasn't zoned out or anything like I was afraid he would be on the meds so that is really good.. He just seemed to be less aggitated some.. Bless my baby's wittle bitty bones.. I love my little monkey head so much..

I am going to the gym tonight.. Actually probably earlier than usual though.. I think we are going to start painting my kitchen tonight.. I have having a little get together Friday and my kitchen looks HORRIBLE from the remodeling..


Here is a pic of my HORRIBLE kitchen right now.. I told mama that I atleast want to get the green paint on the wall and maybe my kick ass curtains up before the party.. We are going to do a metal sheeting thing on the bottom of the chair rail.. But we probably won't get that done in time.. Oh well.. Well in this pic you can't even see the chair rail but it's there I promise!! So far we have ripped down all the really OLD wall paper.. about 5 layers!!! And we also knocked out that horrible desk that Bradyn is touching in the pic..